Leap of Faith

July 25, 2012 at 8:33 pm Leave a comment

I’ve been pretty busy lately. Over the last couple of weeks, I’ve been taking a couple of technology courses in the bid to make myself more marketable on the job front. One thing that I found shocking was that the instructor of my first course had offered to let me take the second course for free. Free. The instructor turned out to be co-owner of the training centre that I was taking course #1 at, so it was his prerogative to do such a thing. I paid about $2,500 for the first course, and the second course was pretty much the same price. For anyone who works in my industry, this is actually an average price for one course. It was surprising for me that he wanted to offer me the course for free. He said that there was only one other person registered for the course, so he wanted a second body there to at least make things a little more interesting. I can see his point, but it was awfully generous of him. I’m certain that he’s also hoping that the goodwill will one day, be reciprocated. Nonetheless, I feel that God has allowed it to happen. Whether or not this is a part of his plan remains to be seen.

I’ve also still been applying to contract positions, and I’m faced with a three month opportunity. While I think it’s a decent opportunity, the thing that hit me was that if I take this opportunity, I won’t be eligible for Employment Insurance any longer. This really scares me because I had always regarded the EI as a backup until I could start getting my feet on the ground. No EI means that we are truly living off of one income. I talked with my husband about my fears, and he told me not to worry. We are debt free. We have savings up our ying-yang. If I really want to work, then he will support that, even if means periods whereby we are living off of one income. God is yanking my security blanket away from me again. Firmly.

So in today’s Bible reading, God is pushing me towards my leap of faith. In the reading, it says:

The Holy Spirit releases his power the moment you take a step of faith… God waits for you to act first. Don’t wait to feel powerful or confident. Move ahead in your weakness, doing the right thing in spite of your fears and feelings. This is how you cooperate with the Holy Spirit, and it is how your character develops.

I have lots of fears and bad feelings. I need to take that leap of faith. God is definitely pushing my character building!

I liken it a lot to my 3-year old boy. There are times when he just doesn’t want to take a leap of faith, no matter how much I tell him it’s okay, and I’ll make things okay. He won’t do it, for whatever thoughts and feelings that are inside of him. From my vantage point, it’s not sensible, and it’s not necessary. But he still won’t trust me. This is where I need to put my trust in God and just leap!  knowing too that he will take care of things for me, just like I take care of things for my son.


Entry filed under: Faith. Tags: , , , , .

Impostor Syndrome … and life goes on …

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